Schloss Flikkema

The important rooms (with live models) are shown at the Castle Flikkema. We left out the bathrooms, laundry, guest, and pantry/storage areas. You'll have to visit if you really want to see them. We love the house God led us to. It's the right amount of room, has heated flooring (a little finicky but we're figuring that out), and great neighbors. Most importantly - it's at the best possible location. Drawbacks? Open, floating stairway (a magnet for Mary) and very, very hard floors. These are nice for cleaning - but must be cleaned more often; and provide thousands of opportunities for bumps on the head - we've seen several already. So we install gates, buy rugs, and make sure we know where the nearest hospital is. Enjoy the pics (scroll down on the right).

I am Mary, hear me roar.

Mary has suddenly decided she's had it with the cute baby routine and will now assert herself decisively when she does or does not want something. Thankfully she's a bit odd and does like vegetables - but that's getting off the subject. Today was a banner day for Miss Mary. She literally pushed Eli out of the way when he attempted to share the toy she was using. She yelled at me and kicked hard enough to shake the table when I didn't feed her fast enough. And then the most hilarious of all.

Eli and Kevin were playing Uno on the couch (Eli's new favorite game and he's good at it) and Mary wanted the cards. She dragged herself to standing at the couch and slowly inched closer and closer to Eli. He saw her coming and moved to block with his right arm. She attempted go go over his arm. He moved his cards further away. She tried to worm under. He shifted his body to shut her out. Now Mary is right on top of him and grabbing his shoulder, pulling and pushing to let him know she wants cards! I am watching and laughing. Finally she grabs a drink coaster sitting nearby and throws it in front of Eli in either an attempt to distract or make a trade, I'm not sure, and goes for the grab with her other hand. This also fails to get her a card - which she would almost certainly eat given the bright pretty colors and her penchant for chewing on non-food items. Being just 10 months old she gracefully accepts defeat, for now.

On a different subject we picked up our second car and are done car shopping. It's a VW Polo Sport - bright blue - and even has a sunroof. Kevin has something to drive to work and we no longer need to drive gutless, silver, bland rental cars. I'm just glad I can now find our cars in the parking lot at the local supermarket. I've walked right up to the door of too many silver wagons I didn't have keys for (see previous post regarding car colors) before realizing the car was not mine.

'Insider' No More

It's true. I've been an 'insider' my entire life. Though not part of the cool crowd at school I was never bottom rung. I have always belonged... at church, at work, at play, at the stores, etc. Now I am getting but a small taste of what it is like to be.... you know... an 'outsider' (ssshhh!). And as I always suspected, it stinks. I get the feeling this is one of those lessons from God that is - gggrrrr - good for me. I guess. Yes I know, being a foreigner in Europe with my ethnicity, background, etcetera is likely easier than anywhere else on the planet and certainly easier than many Americans have it in my own country. Perhaps God knows about my low tolerance for social rejection and I get to start at 'beginner level.'

Diagnosis: Many told us 'everyone speaks English in Europe.' This is a lie. Language is our biggest barrier to becoming 'insiders' here in Germany so believe me I'm noticing who speaks what. Upon moving to Einod, we eagerly began attending neighborhood fests to show we want to get to know people (which we do) and that we're not stuck up Americans who won't even try to learn the language (which we hope we will not be). Admittedly, eagerness has been replaced by resolve. Last night I attended an Advent story time at the village church with the kids. It was very nice and welcoming but of course included holiday songs we don't know and smiling faces afraid to or uninterested in speaking to me. This is becoming a habit. It's a small village and everyone knows each other. At the Christmas Market this weekend we went with a few people the first night and so had a few people we could talk to. Went the second night on our own and we mostly stood alone. You know me - daughter of my parents - I saw a couple I vaguely recognized from Eli's Kindergarten and barged into their group introducing myself all around trying to start a conversation. It worked okay - they were friendly once I broke the 'smile from a distance' - but I came home feeling unsatisfied, unincluded. And it wasn't the first time. This past week has been a reality check in humility. Realizing that shopkeepers try to move you along so they won't have to try so hard to communicate with you or deal with your ignorance of products is humbling. A few weeks back one lady lost patience with me asking her to repeat how much I owed and trying to count change - she grabbed my hand, took the correct coins, and dismissed me. In front of other people. You can imagine how I felt.

Prescription: Like any control freak worthy of the label I work out my frustrated thoughts by obsessively cleaning (as in scrubbing the lid of the garbage can kind of cleaning) and vacuuming (something I've had to learn how to do, as this used to be Kevin's job), checking off every single errand on the to-do list, and generally try to avoid further contact with people. Psychologists would probably call this 'attempting to control my environment' or denial. But, hey! We do what works in our own mini-crises.

Cure: Prescriptions only cover the symptoms, in this case, rather than deal with the problem. And I know the answer already. Trust God. Keep at it (i.e. resolve). Learn. And forever and ever make sure that, if it is even slightly within my realm of influence, include the 'outsiders' and remember that ignorance of a language does not equal unintelligent.

Please Send Ice Cream.

Friends and family have been inquiring as to our desired American products with the holiday season upon us. Unfortunately, the items on our wish list are somewhat difficult to ship:

• Ice Cream: The few varieties available here are frothy/creamy and have little or no added yummies. Kevin cries every night around 10pm in front of the freezer.
• Crock Pot: Slow cooking is unheard of here. Of course, we'd need a 220 volt adapted one.
• Cream Soups: All of my recipes call for these, but they do not exist. Sigh.
• Fritos, Fig Newtons, Lemonades: Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.
• Grocery Carts: The carts here turn on all four wheels and you need the skills of a Nascar driver to turn into the next aisle. (Grocery Bags also desired, but due to recycling mandate - see below - do not exist).
• Gas: Yes, I know you think it is expensive there... it is twice as expensive here. We spend the equivalent of $100+ every time we fill up a full tank in a regular size car.
• Wooden Walls & Closets: Houses are made of poured cement walls. Sturdy but painful and impossible to decorate (many drill bits are now dust, nails die in contorted positions). Closets do not exist - you must purchase (or get from the company, as we do) large pieces of furniture - like wardrobes - to put everything in. Clothes, towels, cleaning supplies. Everything.
• Two Car Garage with House Entry: I will have to back the car out to put the children in. And we can't put a tool kit in there with the car.
• Directions... as in North/East/South/West: They literally do not use these words here. Not in conversation or on the Autobahn. They say, instead "up by Bamburg" or "near Miesenbach." And the signs on the Autobahn are the same. An entrance/exit ramp has only city names on it so unless you know every town in Germany, you do not know whether you are getting on going north or south. Takes some getting used to. Or a GPS system.

What can we send? It's easiest to notice what we are lacking but there is much that is also good. If we could we would export to you:

• Lindt Chocolates: I'm convinced they come directly from heaven.
• Recycling System: You must recycle, as true garbage gets picked up only twice a month and the can is very small. This is enforced and done quite well.
• Autobahn Speeds: There are speed zones, and construction, but in between them you can go very, very fast.
• Checkless Banking: Checks are not available here. You bring the bill to the bank (and of course can go online), they stamp it, it's done.

But the cars are European designed (just don't buy a European minivan - not as advanced as American and sliding doors are unheard of) and quite nice. So we bought a car. An Opel Vectra. This is a GM brand that left the states in 1975 but does well in Europe. It has more features than we need but was a good price, used, so we sacrificed our humility and drove it home. Black. This is noteworthy only because 92.6 percent of the cars on the road in Germany are silver. This is absolutely true. You can NOT get a white car at all and red/maroon is a very rare sight indeed. We did get a wagon however, which half of the population drives - though mostly in silver. My fav features are auto open/close hatch in the back, heated leather seats, and dual climate control.

Kid Updates: Mary has finally started crawling on her knees. And today she pulled herself up a few times. She was extremely proud of herself, excited, and twice as cute. Eli has a goose egg on his forehead that may get me arrested but he did it all by himself on our hard tile floors. Yesterday he says to me "Mom, when are you ever going to do laundry? My laundry basket is full." I live to serve.

Drink and Be Merry

Those of you who know me well know that I drink pink lemonade (or regular to spice things up) almost constantly. When I really wanted something special I would drive to my local Starbucks or Caribou and have myself a Tall Carmel Hot Apple Cider (aka Hot Apple Spice) with whip topping. Much to my horror I learned that these items are not available in Germany. At all. They are, like Fig Newtons and Fritos and Canned Cream Soups - a good 3500 miles away. For me this continues to be a serious beverage crisis. My current substitute of Coke (Pepsi is findable but not popular) is probably not so healthy. But really, drinking bubble-enhanced water is just not refreshing. Everyone here drinks flavorless carbonated water. I do not claim to understand.

Yesterday I forced Kevin to take vacation and have a family day. I had warned him that there would be happiness and joy and bonding, all day. This was tough to do as Eli is still recovering from his sickness and is not the sweetest of boys. We did manage to get to the toy store, which was fun, and found a Christmas Tree. Christmas, by the way, is December 24th and is called Weihnachs (Holy Night). It is followed by the 2nd and 3rd days of Christmas - three holidays.

So we went to the one place that has trees - like a Home Depot - and were the only people buying one. The folks around here don't sell or buy trees til one week before Christmas. Kevin's coworkers say the tree will die and think we are crazy Americans. But I think we figured it out - their tree stands are not made to hold water - they just hold the tree. So it looks great - I'll include a pic soon.

And today - the 6th - is St. Nicholas Day. Tradition has it that children put their shoes outside their doors the evening before and St. Nicholas will give them some treats and small toys if they've been good - or beat them with a switch if they've been bad. Germans of our generation say the 'bad kid' part of the story is not so popular anymore and gets left out of the story. Eli put out his shoes last night. We decided to blame his attitude on being sick and let him have his little treats. Besides, he had already gotten a taste of the switch last night during an incident at bath time. Mary got nothing - it's tough being a baby.

Busy Days

We will never again doubt those who say having two young children is 4 times busier than having 1. We can't doubt it; we're experiencing it. Eli was home sick today so getting many things done: buying train tickets to London, making a deal on a car (one down!), ordering curtains, clearing up bank messes - plus the usual cooking and cleaning - makes for a very tired me. To top it all off I burned myself on the oven - which I could show you on the web cam if you'd all get hooked up and be online occasionally (speaking to members of the Wanders family here).

We bought an Opel Vectra Caravan (a wagon). I know, I know, just what you've always wanted. We'll take pictures when we get it home in a week. Paperwork and proof of insurance, pollution controls, and general trustworthiness is required to take a vehicle home in Germany and it can take awhile. Just as many things do (i.e. phone/Internet service, 2+ months).

For fun: Eli's two favorite words right now, besides 'nein' (no, in German), are 'Botheration!' when he's annoyed, or 'Whatever' - sometimes in a snotty tone - when I've asked him to do something. This from my 3 year old. Mary's favorite words are 'da da da da da'. She otherwise keeps busy pulling hair / earrings (belonging to mom or sometimes a stranger standing too close), demanding adult food - though she has no teeth, or trying to do everything Eli does. She actually tries to drive cars and trains. It is so cute. I will try to get a mini-movie this week.

Church & Children

We found a church last Sunday! And went again today. It's a German church led by an American pastor. Evangelical Free, the services are mostly in German with some songs in English. The sermon and announcements are translated into English live and we wear earpieces so we can see/hear both languages. Smallish but half Americans and half Germans. Very nice, very normal, and we don't plan to look any more.

And then... Eli got sick. Started coughing / barking like a seal = Croup. Yuck. He's already been awake once. During the day though it wasn't too bad. Cute moment: At dinner we were wondering what the word for 'mouth' was in German (Deutsch) and we didn't know. Kevin says "Boca is what it is in Spanish." Sandra says "Bouche is what it is in French." Then Eli says in all seriousness "Mund is what it is in Deutsch." We look at him rather surprised. I go to get the bilingual dictionary - he's right. Counted to 'Ein Hundert' auf Deutsch on the way to church this morning to amuse himself, I guess. Picking things up quickly as we knew he would.

To begin with...

Tough to put the last 2 months into a post so I'll summarize:

• Week #1 - Rough. Awake at night, tired during the day, Mary had a terrible cold, ate whatever we could find (not well) and generally felt like aliens.
• Week #2 - Slightly better... but we left city hall with our passports on the car roof in a folder and then saw them in the rear-view mirror spread all over a major road. I ran in front of traffic to retrieve them. Learned "tut mir leid" (I'm sorry) as our new favorite phrase, to be said whenever we messed up - often.
• Week #3 - Dealt with house closing paperwork by driving to the US embassy in Luxembourg for US notary services - painful - and moved IN to our new place which actually went very well.
• Week #4 - Discovered doors lock differently in this country... spent more than an hour outside our front door, even though we had the key, because we had left a key on the inside lock of the door and you can not get in. Landlord came and broke in. Many neighbors noticed, commented, and were surely amused at the American doofuses.
• Week #5 - Eli is liking school a little at a time. We love them - very sweet & helpful. Final closing on the house in Iowa.
• Weeks 6-8 Settling into the house - shopping constantly. And went to Bavaria to get away from settling in. Kevin was gone for a week in there and I continued to figure out how to feed the family. Went to a fun kids playground place, though... and that's the day it began to rain.
• Weeks 9-10 Rain, rain, rain. What does the sun look like anyway? Planning for Christmas and shopping for cars - not the funnest job but necessary. Mary had her 9-month appointment. She weighed 9.13 kilograms and was 74 centimeters long for those of you who like to do conversions. And she had another cold. Hopefully she's getting it all done before winter really sets in.