Coming Out of the (Christmas) Closet

I'm ready to come right out with it and admit that I love Christmas. My husband will be shocked, embarrassed, and saddened at this admission but I can't hide it anymore. It's just fun. Eli is singing Advent songs (in German) constantly and listens to the Psalty's Christmas tape several times each day (okay, that one I don't love). Mary often points to the star at the top of our tree ("stah!, stah!") and I've caught both of them playing with the ornaments and snow globe (I need to find a nativity set they can play with - let me know if you have ideas). It started early for us with St. Nicolas Day - the kids got smaller gifts...

Throughout December my favorites are reading the Christmas stories, special candles, giving gifts to our friends and neighbors, and of course watching the kids open presents. We did BIG Christmas for the kids early as we leave tomorrow morning for the States. Adopting the European tradition of wooden toys, Eli received two big trucks (dump truck and auto transporter with 2 wooden cars) and Mary has her kitchen (with pots, cooking utensils, tea set). They love them and we've had hours of fun playing since opening them last Saturday.

I always feel especially blessed this time of year remembering what an incredible gift Jesus was and is to us and how much of a blessing it is to give to others and share the real story of Christmas. Merry Christmas to all of you and God Bless!

Surviving (December) to Tell the Tale

Advent is a strange time of year here in Germany. Celebrated to a greater degree then Christmas and completely secular, it is primarily characterized by candles, singing about St. Nicolas, and Stollen (like fruit cake, but tastes good). The absolute must for every household, indeed for every person in that household, is an Advent Calendar with 24 little doors (for each day of December before Christmas Day) containing chocolate or toys or pictures of naked people. Yes. You read that correctly. Advent Calendars come in every variety, none of them remotely related to the story of Christ. Eli was given a HotWheels version by our neighbor. Not surprisingly, he likes it.

December 6 is, of course, Saint Nicolas Day, when children put a boot or shoe outside the door the evening before and find a small toy, chocolate, oranges, and nuts inside in the morning. Plus many parties with appearances by Santa and more of the same (I have a LOT of oranges and cheap chocolate bars in residence at this time). Last weekend was overwhelming with a soccer celebration (Eli did get a cool bag with his initials monogrammed on it), tumbling class party, and a birthday party at our neighbors house... which brings me to my next point.

Mothers really should trust their instincts when it comes to 'gut feelings' about their children getting sick, even before the evidence is in. We were invited to our neighbors' birthday party. This is a big deal. Birthdays are very important days to adults in Germany and to be invited to a party means you are finally IN, accepted and all that. Just before walking over, Eli seemed a bit unwell and I wondered.... So we are there for 5 minutes and just about to partake of a spread of food better than a cruise line buffet when Eli sits down on the floor and throws up. Everywhere. How very, very awkward. Despite being a no-child couple, they are child-lovers and were gracious while I apologized profusely. Kevin carried him home, I cleaned up and nobody got to eat.

We survived a crush of people at the Stuttgart Christmas Market last Sunday and sent Eli to school on Monday. This was not wise. Tuesday at 4am he began barking (coughing) like a seal between crying fits. Sigh. So he was home for two days and I desperately tried to keep him busy. I hope we can make it through these current school-spread bugs before we fly.

What else happened last week? Oh yes. Mary got a shot and our much-loved doctor said she's leaving the practice. Eli put my razor in his mouth to see 'what would happen' (we have discovered that it causes the tongue to bleed painfully) and he knocked over some candles with burning hot wax onto the table. Another party in the freezing cold for the toddlers with Saint Nicolas on a horse (Mary was the only child not afraid of him). Finally, Thursday, I continued the fun by deciding to make shaped sugar cookies with the kids. The kitchen looked like a war zone and my heart rate has still not returned to normal. I believe the kids had fun cutting shapes but it was hard to tell with all the flour, sugar, fighting for cookie cutters and dough real-estate, shoving to get bite-sized doughy snacks, and general chaos. No, I did not remember to take pictures. But I did when we decorated on Friday.

And December isn't even half done yet.

Put Away the T-shirts

Eli has learned that God sometimes answers prayer in his favor. He asked for snow. It came. This is more surprising than usual since none came last year. A few Saturdays back the kids are jumping on us in our bed (at what age can parents bar the children from invading their room?) and we suggested that Eli look out the window. It is 8:00am. SNOWWWWWW!!!!!!!!! A cacophony of excited yelling, quick dressing, and loud breakfast immediately followed. We were fully geared and outside by 9:00am. And we were the only people outside. Our children made the first boot-prints on the nearby soccer field, several snow angels, and threw snow balls. We had no plans that day and it was our best family day in a long, long time. We played for an hour, drank hot chocolate, decorated the house for Christmas, and found a tree that afternoon. The kids were in heaven. It was great.

My Portion & Dessert

Cruising was good. Will I cruise 10 times a year and vacation no other way? No. But I did enjoy not cooking, not cleaning and seeing cool places while staying in one place. That was really the best part. And the staff actually do customer service, all the time. Dubrovnik was the coolest, Santorini the prettiest, and Kusadasi/Ephesus the most interesting. And Venice I just loved with all the time we spent there. I gained 5 pounds and one truly authentic Turkish rug. I plan to hang it on a wall some day soon.

Hope mom & dad enjoyed it. We did. And we're really glad they came. One of the surprises was the quality of the nightly entertainment - only 3-4 of which we caught. Full of talented dancers and singers that put on rousing shows I liked. The biggest disappointments were corny 'directors' (of the cruise experience, of the port experience) who were full of themselves and sounded like infomercials. We ignored them. My experience proved my practice... heavily research, plan, and negotiate your own vacation - no matter the 'all-inclusive' promises and deals. You will always come out better in the end - financially and experientially.

After a long battle in which I finally vanquished the laundry pile, we returned to normal life. The St. Martin Lantern Walk with the kindergarten (kids eat giant bread-men and adults drink strong wine after), Parents' Night for Eli's class (he is one of the kids they have zero worries about), Mary's first hair trim (she watched daddy and Eli go first so no problems), and organizing the growing local John Deere expat group. I missed a lot of regular neighborhood thingys and friends over the last 6 weeks so have been catching up socially and getting back into homeschool with Eli - who begs constantly to do math, of all things.

Somewhere in there we had a genuine Thanksgiving Dinner at church with yum yum turkey and stuffing. I had to bring the homemade Mac-n-Cheese.... huh? They swore it was traditional in the South. New to me but I followed orders and the crockpot was empty at the end of the night.
But mostly I have been preparing for CHRISTMAS! I think it's more exciting when you have excited kids. I can't wait for the kids to open presents and have been diligently preparing by tossing old toys and looking for a new toy cabinet. More to come.

Mary's Portion

The life of a celebrity is so very demanding. On this trip I perfected my 'camera smile' and 'goodbye kiss' for my fans (cruise staff) and the paparazzi (other tourists). I caused grown men to sigh and ask for pictures and consented to hair-touching by strangers from around the world. Mom is threatening to dye my hair a very dark color. I also learned how to be very certain I get the attention I require... I hit the nearest parent and yell MOMMY! or DADDY! repeatedly, loudly, relentlessly. It works quite well. I tried to hurt myself in a variety of ways climbing the ladder to "Eye-Yigh's" bunk on the ship (that's how I say Eli) or going down the stairs (do NOT help me) and asserted my independence to the great amusement of Grandpa Wanders who kept saying "She is a piece of work!" to my mommy. A college student we met in Venice (as she was taking my picture and talking to Grandma) was majoring in Child Development. She said "try to keep her alive until she grows up and becomes the President or a CEO, then you'll be fine." I don't know what that means but mommy and daddy went to bed exhausted every night.

Our first sea day I woke up with a fever and it stayed with me all day. All I wanted to do that day was sit in mommy or daddy's lap. I didn't play with toys, eat, or walk around. Given my usual persona this was highly alarming to my parents. But I was fully recovered after a few naps and a full nights sleep for our adventure in Ephesus the following day. Phew! Too much travelling and excitement for me, I guess. On a few occasions throughout the week I allowed Grandpa (with ice cream) or Grandma to hold me or take me on a walk. I liked mini-golf, climbing rocks, and spotting animals (cats absolutely everywhere in Dubrovnik and Ephesus; dogs in Santorini, fish in Venice) wherever they could be found. I'm turning into a good traveller (even on plane trips! SHORT plane trips!) and invite (dare) you to come and try it with me.

The Main Course: Eli's Portion

My favorite activity in all our mediterranean stops (especially in Venice) was chasing pigeons. It was my goal to get them to fly away but they were too well fed and too used to people so I had to work hard! Here's a video of me in St. Marks Square.

I loved our cruise! Especially Club Ocean. It was so much fun. The teachers blew up a volcano and took us on lots of fun walks around the ship like the Pirate Parade, the Alien Hunt, and Trick-or-Treating on Halloween. I made lots of friends there and other places too. Marie was also from Germany but the teachers didn't speak German so I helped them talk to her sometimes. We even had kids' dinner two times. Plus movies, crafts, toys and songs. Heaven!


I could have hot dogs, cookies, and apple juice all day long on the ship. One day I played Dominoes with Grandma in the library. And we played miniature golf a few times too. All the workers were really nice and always gave us stuff... like chocolates before bedtime and animals made out of towels in our room. I needed a nap every day since I was staying up so late at Club Ocean (10pm most nights) and walking all over the place when we docked. One day we walked 12 kilometers (that's 8 miles for you folks on the US system) across the island of Santorini in Greece!! Two dogs followed us the whole way. They were nice but I was nervous for awhile around them. It was a very hard hike but I'm a 'trooper' said mom and dad and I made it.

Mom and Dad were laughing because I make friends (blond women in their 20's; children of all ages) wherever I go and strangers always seem to know my name. Greetings come my way at the weirdest places... an out of the way restaurant in Dubrovnik, Croatia (blond girl I met walking around the ship); the palace in Venice (Marie from Germany); and at the airport just before coming home (some kids from the club). And I made some moves on Holly, the just married young woman at our dining room table. Her new husband, Michael, was laughing because I asked Holly to sit with me by the window for awhile and told her secrets and smiled at her.

I loved all the boats in Venice and riding on the Vaporettos (like public buses) and the Gondola. In Turkey I learned how to make rugs and roll them up and even saw a "flying carpet." Sometimes I rode on Grandpas shoulders or held Grandmas hand while we walked. It was a wonderful vacation.

An Appetizer

For a brief period B.C. (Before Cruise) we did a few day trips... Heidelberg, Germany; Beaufort Castle in Luxembourg; and Bastogne, Belgium.

This is your appetizer before the main course - which will be delectable cuts of personal cruise vacation perspectives embellished with superlative gravy on a bed of anecdotes. Enjoy with your choice of 'whine.'

Poor dad. He flies into Frankfurt and has to wander around looking for us in a mess of an airport (fog, accidents, traffic delays) and then gets dragged out for the day to Heidelberg: a beautiful city he probably barely noticed due to yawning, sleep-deprived eyes. BUT once I got there (again, slightly lost) we had a nice couple of hours people watching and walking in central Germany. The highlight for me was the student prison, used from 1798 - 1910 to hold unruly students for 3 day detentions for such crimes as snuffing out street lamps or chasing pig farmers through the streets. Silhouette graffiti art made with candle soot was actually pretty cool. We bribed the kids with ice cream and a giant gummy bear to keep them going. The catechism was written here, a welcoming town for Protestantism when it was still a new and rebellious idea.

A few days later we drove out of miserable weather to Luxembourg and explored a fabulous ruins castle with cellars, passageways, and fun rocks to climb before continuing to Bastogne in Belgium. Dad's uncle was a 'Bastard of Bastogne' in one of the most significant WWII battles and we saw the interesting museum and memorial there. We all had the audio-tour guides (like a phone you hold to your ear as you walk and listen) BUT mine was irretrievably stolen by a little blond thief in need of entertainment. The movie about the battle of Bastogne was really, really informative and inspiring and made me proud of America. Had dinner in a cute little cafe where I had to practice my French before heading home. it was a great day all around.

My pastor came for dinner one night and talked with dad, lots of fun, and we all went to the Kite-Fest for Eli's class in the hills above our house on a cold, windy day before heading for the warmth of the Mediterranean.... and with that last tasty morsel, be on the lookout in days to come for more good stuff.

Sweetness & Strasbourg

It didn't start out too well. Mom's (mine) first trip to Europe heralded grey and rainy skies and fog. Lots of fog. Her 2nd day here we went to Luxembourg to find the Valley of the Seven Castles. Disaster. Rain, cold, and construction meant everything was closed or impossible to enjoy. Sigh. But the weather did improve last week and German locals came through... Mom met many friendly, wonderful people.

• Eli's teacher, who tried so hard to impress her.
• The local flower shop owner, who presented her (and Mary) with a single rose one morning when we stopped by (which caused me to buy more flowers for my porch).
• My elderly neighbor, who begged us to come for tea and then presented, on fine china, a homemade, incredible cheesecake, several teas, and good conversation.
• Our good friend from the local bank, who came over for dinner and brought mom an autumn bouquet.
• My German language teacher, who gave us several ideas of places we could go and see.
• The pastor and his wife at church, who engaged her and a British couple in conversation for half an hour.
• and more....

I think she's ready to move here permanently. The people, rather than the sight (which have improved, see below) seem to have won her over - just as they have me this past year.

Nanstein Castle was our first foray into tourism after Luxembourg and she was impressed with her first ruins romp. Then Saturday we decided to dare the skies and head south and east into France. It was fog soup the whole way there and then, as we reached the city limits, sunshine! Lovely, 75 degrees, cathedral and carousel and riverboat tour and street performers galore. Saw a few cute villages on our way home, as well. I may dare again this Friday and Saturday.

Note to Self: The next time we move to Europe and expect visitors, buy a minivan. Guess who gets to sit in between two large car seats filled with cranky attention-hungry children in her own car? It's more than worth the mental pain and physical bullying (Mary does NOT like it when I touch her armrest, like I have a choice)... but I also need a good 2-hour break from my kids afterwards.

Realities of The Rhine

Ahhh, The Rhine. Romantic castles, incredible views, and tourists. It felt a little bit like being on a foreign game show where players' expectations don't quite match up with the reality of experience. Our odd impressions and pictures are below. Having said that - I can't wait to go back. It is beautiful. The castles are cool. The trip (in August) was great.

There really are castles everywhere you look on this section of the Rhine and it is impressive, especially from the river. We went to one 'ruins castle' where you can explore freely, and one 'tour castle' where you have a guide to see the restored inside rooms (not as much fun but cool to learn about). And we rode a river boat, the train, and a ferry. The ferry rides were Kevin's first and I think he liked it. We rode it five times. There are no bridges over the Rhine for 60 miles so ferries are necessary, plentiful, and fun.

Odd Observation #1: There is no shortage of flying insects on the Rhine. Be prepared to do battle for your food. You may have paid for it but he flies and the bees.... they want it. And they are persistent - indoors and out. Meals were all-out war zones with menus and hands waving and they were, unfortunately, long. I would love to 'do as the Europeans do' and linger over a long and lazy meal. But I have two kids. Who do not linger well when hungry. And I hate insects. Particularly those that fly.

Odd Observation #2: There is a shortage of blonds in Europe and particularly among tour groups. We've run into this before being (often) the only tourists with two cute little kids around. But Mary, with her platinum hair, gets celebrity-level attention. This was particularly strong attention to the point we were dodging tour groups and Kevin was getting upset. Strangers wanted to hold her (and tried to lure her from my arms) and numerous home movies and photos were taken, all featuring Mary. I said it was fine but I would hold her, thank you, and would have to be in the pictures too. Finally we just had to avoid them. Don't be afraid to bring your cute little towheads to Europe... just make sure they wear hats.

Odd Observation #3: We used to be the enemy and sometimes it still feels strange. The plaque in one very touristy town stated (in English) that 23 little kids and teachers died at a Kindergarten during an allied bombing raid. It's so sad to think my country was the likely bomber, but that the war against Germany was necessary back then, however we feel no animosity toward each other as people now, and how odd it all is, 62+ years later.

...education, in progress.

One Year On / A Friend!

Exactly one year and two days ago we arrived weary, confused, and cold in a strange country that was gray and rainy and impossible (at that time) for us to understand. My, how things have changed. God's grace got us through those first very, very rough weeks and then the rough couple of months that followed. And here we are. A year later and I can be grateful that:

• I no longer go to bed early with headaches from brain-strain. Now I just stay up too late.
• We rarely need to throw out scary 'adventurous' foods anymore.
• This is home (apologies to offended family members).
• We have successfully, though not without hilarity, travelled with our kids.
• We have many friends, a busy social life, and a good church.
• I can have a simple conversation with my neighbors, and I even like them.
• My kids are healthy, happy, and humbling (to me).

Honestly, we love having visitors from the States. Please. Come visit us. Our rules are simple. You must stop by, use us for a base, or let us meet you for a day or two at least. BUT you must also venture forth on your own and explore this very interesting area of the world. Tough love. My old friend Deb came this week after hanging out with her husband (then he left to join his dad). Kevin was gone so it was us girls and the kids. We had a good visit and I really enjoyed having a girlfriend around to talk to. We even went to Luxembourg for a day. Then Kevin came back from Iowa and brought me lots of goodies. What was I most excited to see? Vanilla. As in vanilla extract for baking. Pathetic, but thrills come cheap when you're desperate for good old American basics.

Trouble

Our beautiful daughter is smart, determined, and on a collision course with danger. She watches and then continues trying until she figures out how to do something. Here, she is disabling the child safety lock to the cupboard with the garbage and cleaning supplies (which have now been moved to a shelf six feet high). She's also recently been caught carrying around a knife, standing on the kitchen table after moving the counter height chairs back and pulling herself onto them to get up there, and purposely laying on her back under the bath water where she can't get back up. And she's very close to running. We're afraid to even leave her in another room.

How to Say "I'm American!" Without Words

First, some humorous mistakes I've made that I'll share... for your enjoyment.

#1 Before our summer sojourn and immediately after I wondered why our dishes and glasses were so cloudy coming out of the dish washer. On my next trip to the store I took a closer look at the cleaning aisles. I saw the tabs I use in the dish soap aisle - okay. Then I saw them (again?) in the laundry soap aisle! Huh? Wouldn't you know they look identical and come in the same size/color boxes except for the instructions on the back. You can guess what was wrong. Freshly laundered wine glass, anyone?

#2 I always wondered why my first playdate with a German neighbor didn't go that well many months ago. A boy in Eli's class invited him for the afternoon and we went - it was awkward and tough discussion for a few hours before we left. Come to find out recently through some German acquaintances that when an invitation is issued for Eli... it's just for him. I wasn't supposed to barge in with my daughter and stay!! Horror! She still says hello to me but there haven't been any more invitations. Oops.

Summer, especially, has revealed some noticeable differences in our two cultures that I'll call: How to say "I'm American!" without words.

• Wear shorts. In Germany, the only shorts you can even find to purchase are jogging or exercise shorts. That goes for men and women. Otherwise you wear capri's. That also goes for men (they all wear them) and women. And if you're going swimming? Wear speedos... tops optional. Again, that's for men and women.
• Wear your wedding ring on your left hand. In Europe, wedding rings are worn on the ring finger of the right hand. Feels too weird to us, though.
• Wear khaki's. Kevin learned this at work, and it's true. Professional men in Germany do not look like they could leave work immediately for the golf course without changing.
• Have your fork with your right hand. The fork never touches the right hand in Germany. You don't cut with it and you don't eat with it. Fork in left, knife in right, no exceptions.
• Hug your friends in greeting. I've quickly learned to become comfortable with the double-cheek-kiss greeting with guys and gals alike. Kevin is still working on it.
• Start drinking your beer / wine immediately. You always, always say 'Prost!' and clink glasses while making eye contact (VIP) before taking a sip. This rule holds even when a coupla guys are going out for a few beers.
• Dress casually. This is my most regular infraction and may have been mentioned before. A German does not leave the house in the morning, even if they are only going to the post office, without doing their hair, donning makeup (women only), and shining their shoes (which, by the way, should be boots 90% of the time).

Now you know what to do if you are looking to fit in... or stand out.

The European Way

You may already know that Europeans often take the month of August off. Entirely. This is easy to do when one has 6+ weeks of vacation to burn each year. Well.... my absence from the blog this past month was unintentional (lazy?) but, I like to think, very "European." Anyway, please forgive me. I'm emerging from my summer haze and will be getting rapidly back on track. This post will have to be updates on summer happs and the next will be more strange things about being American in Germany. Being gone awhile changes ones perspective all over again, at least temporarily.

ELI: Removing this child's tonsils was our wisest decision this year. His appetite is up 90%. His whining is down by 90%. He is happier when he wakes up, needs no naps, and needs far less disciplinary intervention. While I'm sure there are coincidences as well as causes here, we like it. In fact, I'm thinking mine ought to come out.... I could do with a better attitude myself. Eli's social calendar is currently busier than ours with soccer, tumbling, school and playdates. Sadly, he had a cavity this summer and it was not a pretty scene. But he is mature enough to understand why it was needed. He really is a great kid.



MARY: Our own little 'Dennis the Menace' is at least as social as her brother and now has mommy-and-me playgroup as well as tumbling on her weekly calendar. She says 'heis' (hot) and 'tschuss' (bye-bye) in German and 'Maaaahh' (mom) and 'Doddee' (daddy, Eli, dog) in English. She says many, many other words and screeches in her own language as well. She is also a celebrity at church and when we travel (story to come on the Rhine trip). She revels in the attention and is an opinionated, overly-dramatic tomboy. She's also incredibly cute.



KEVIN: Struggling to hold a 3-person team together with one going to the states, soon, for a 2-year assignment and another laid up for 2 months following a bad fall off of her horse. Trying to find some employees and do work occasionally. This good man almost always comes home in time for dinner and always, always comes home in time for me to go to German class, Bible Study, or get my haircut. Plus he meets me in town for tough doctors appointments.

ME: I gained a bit of weight back during my States stay and have been slowly but surely losing it since getting back. Strange. Really feeling like this is my neighborhood lately and talking to lots of moms, getting together for playdates and talking... it's a good feeling. Looking forward to welcoming possibly two new Deere families to our area (only three families right now) this fall and - are you sitting down? - starting some homeschooling with Eli. I know, I know. This from the mom who looks for places her kids can go away from the house. But Eli wants so badly to read (already does most 3-letter words) and asks math questions all day long. These are things he won't get in school. Found a cool christian homeschooling company through a friend and will spend 30-60 minutes a day with Eli working on a rounded program. Not hardcore yet, we'll see how it goes. It can only happen when Mary is asleep anyway.

Golf - Scotland

As Sandra mentioned...I spent last weekend in Scotland golfing. As most of you know - Sandra, Eli, and Mary stayed in Montana for an additional three weeks after I returned to Germany. Somewhat by coincidence, the other Deere expat family in Zweibruecken (John, Sarah, and their 4 kids) are in the same situation for most of July - John in Germany and the family in the States. It soon became obvious that John and I had to go golfing somewhere for a weekend while our wife's and kids were away. What a better place then St. Andrews!
Little did we know what it takes to actually play the Old Course....a Handicap Index, entering the Ballot, and of course having decent weather. We learned at 5Pm on Friday (just prior to our departure for the airport) that we were on the Ballot for 11:10 Saturday morning. Having a tee time on the Old Course was our main objective for the weekend. The course is closed on Sunday, so the only other day would have been Monday as we flew home on Tuesday morning. In route to the airport, I called Carnoustie and was given a tee time for Monday. The weekend was falling together better then could be expected. We played the Castle Course (the 7th course at St. Andrews which opened just this summer) on Sunday. Photos from the weekend:

We experienced all the weather that Scotland could throw at us. We teed off on the Old Course in a pouring rain - that rain suite in my bag finally paid off. It rained and blew steadily through the first 4 or 5 holes. As should have been expected, the course layout played directly into the wind going out. I am looking forward to 2010 when the Open returns to the Old Course, it will be a new experience seeing the Pros play it now. Sunday brought another experience, clear blue sky's....with a 30+ mph wind. The Castle course is built on a bluff over the North See just outside of St. Andrews - spectacular views - a true Links experience. Monday brought us to Carnoustie with perfect weather which was needed. From my perspective, the most difficult test of the weekend. Long par 4's and numerous deep bunkers, as well as the Barry Burn which has an amazing ability to attract golf balls.
My play was less then great - I really had no expectations having not played since last summer. I would love to go back and give it another try someday....let me know if you are interested!

Where in the World...

I'm thankful Eli is so adaptable as he hasn't been sure of the state (or country) we're in for several weeks now. On August 1st we will return to Germany after 9 days in Arizona and 4+ weeks here in Montana.

For Kevin and I it has been largely a fun, sleep-deprived, crazy vacation. I've had a few mini-breakdowns (see Eli's update) and Kevin is now golfing in Scotland (yes, I'm serious). These last few weeks 'should' be more relaxed and, hopefully, doctor free.

Mary has started hitting, trying to run and swim (read: head injuries and chlorine swallowing), and forming words. She's also been teething and therefore not sleeping. All animals are still 'doggies' that say 'moo' but there are signs she is differentiating now. And she is wise enough to maintain her charming cuteness in order to avoid serious consequences after she empties cupboards or dumps her food bowl or hits me in the face.

Eli made it through Arizona only to get an infection (that's SIX since March) on our travel day to Montana.... it was not pretty as I had little pain relief medicine. Thus started the saga: Urgent Care the next morning, ENT the day after that, heavily-drugged reunion weekend, lots of phone calls to other ENT's and finally a 2.5 hour trip to Billings with an ENT that had an opening. He listened to our whole sordid story and did surgery this past Monday, in front of his other patients already scheduled, to accommodate necessary recovery time before travelling. The doctor said the tonsils he removed were big and ugly. Eli is 5 days out as of today and doing really quite well with some pain but no bleeding. He's been active, having fun with cousins and new friends, getting spoiled and farming with Grandpa.

Other than that we've been shopping, gaining weight (unfortunately), and enjoying the beautiful summer weather with trips to Yellowstone and the County Fair. Althea (Kevin's mom) has been doing fabulously and taking care of me while I attempt to take care of the kids. I drag her out of the house once or twice a day for kid-friendly activities and then we all come back for afternoon naps. It works out pretty well.

I'm glad we're staying so long in Montana. It is definitely (as always) by God's design.

Share and Share Alike

WARNING: Complaining Ahead! Ahh, sharing. That most important life lesson that toddlers struggle with each and every day. Our children don't want to share their toys, their snacks, or their mommy's lap. One thing they seem to have no problem sharing is germs. As Eli was finishing up his 3rd round of antibiotic for strep this week, Mary finally succombed. I brought her in on Tuesday with general crankiness and they found strep and an ear infection. Eli finished his medicine on Thursday morning. Today (Friday) he woke up screaming with a slight fever. Against all odds and most of my doctor's experience (even she is surprised now), he has strep - ONE DAY after his last sickness. And possibly stomach flu since he's trying to throw up and complaining about his tummy. So this is #4 in four months, not including the whole Mono incident. We now have more bottles of medicine in the refridgerator than food items. The doctor wonders if he may have a condition where strep lives permanently in his mouth. May need to test for that after returning from the States with an ENT Specialist. The fun continues.

So we have things to discuss regarding our trip coming up... do we find a pediatrician in Arizona or Montana to get another doctor's thoughts on the situation (we may have to, anyway, for more medicine)? Do we keep Eli away from everyone in fear that he is potentially contagious unless on an antibiotic? Can we even stay at Mom & Dad's in Montana with Mom's immune system knocked low by her chemotherapy? Please say a prayer for us this week and for Eli. I'm begging God for a healthy boy for 6 weeks in the USA and a little wisdom and rest as well.

Mary Contrary / German Philosophy on Children

First, our most important news... "Stubborn Girl Walks!!" Click on the links below to see the videos (couldn't get them into the blog, don't know why). Mary has joined the toddler club.

#1 Stubborn Girl Walking
#2 Mary Gets Bribed

We are exceedingly grateful. Mary is a determined "I'll do it!" kid and sometimes bully about almost everything. Finally she has added walking to her repertoire. Today she walked the main floor circuit twice, grinning, just to show me she could do it now. While my biceps may start to weaken (currently I can carry two children across a foreign city for miles) I am just glad we can put her down on the ground without worrying about her looking for disturbing things to eat... I caught her licking an ant off the floor last week.

Speaking of eating. Look who's feeding herself now. Last week we gave Mary a spoon and bowl at mealtimes. Just what she had been waiting for, apparently. Now we receive high-pitched lectures, withering glares, and hand slaps (our hands, that is) if we attempt to help her get food on the spoon or, heaven forbid, touch her bowl. I am going to try to get her 'death stare' on camera soon. We laugh and wonder if she will go to Hollywood instead of college someday.

But she LOVES her big brother. She has started giving Eli hugs when we pick him up from school and will pet his hair or put her arm around him when he reads her a story (but won't let him cuddle on her). And she copies, exactly, everything he does. She watches him closely and then mimics. This is good and bad. She has learned how to drink from a straw, fill and pour with cups, and "read" a book earlier than Eli did. But she has also learned how to climb on tables, beg for treats, and be naughty faster too.

There are a few oddities that I'll categorize as being part of the German Philosophy on Children. I'm only in the introductory course so keep an eye out for followup articles.

• Your children WILL be healthy. Several months back I got a long, unreadable (for me) letter from the Minister of Health, Justice, and Social Welfare of the State we live in (Saarland). It had to do with Mary and appeared medical in nature. I brought it to my doctor and they said they would take care of it. Just after Eli's 4th birthday I got a similar looking letter for him, forgot about it, got a second letter, and neglected to take it to my doctor on one of our many sick visits. Then on Thursday I got a third letter from this office with a handwritten form saying they would be at my house (gah!!) on Monday for a home visit from 10am - 12pm!!! Calling in a panic I found an English speaker who said if they don't hear from your doctor around your child's birthday that they have had an annual checkup, they will show up at your door to do the physical themselves. I called my doctor and think we have it all cleared up. Eli had a lengthy 4-year physical and developmental review (completely in German) which he passed just fine. Sheesh.
• Children are welcome in stores. Or... at least their parents' Euros are welcome. My kids get an average of 2 gummy bear packets, 1 balloon, 1 piece of sausage, 1 slice of cheese and 1 sucker each every time we do an errand run. And the grocery store, furniture store, and Ikea have free, supervised playrooms (with ball pits, slides, toys) where you can leave your potty-trained child while you shop. Eli loves these places. Mary is frustrated that she can't go too.
• Children are not welcome elsewhere. Restaurants (the kind with napkins and silverware), many video stores (strange but true) and even churches are included in this category. The local church offers a service for kids... once a month on Wednesday afternoons (when they take naps).... nothing is offered on Sunday mornings other than a regular service (no nursery, childrens worship). Our church is different, thankfully.
• Kid-Centered Businesses are Rare. A few toy stores, the pools, and some playplaces can be found but there are too few Pediatricians, no pediatric dentists, no kids hair cut places, no kids' restaurants (equals nowhere to have a birthday party) and no mid-range clothing stores. And good luck finding a babysitter. Everyone lives near parents or other relatives so this is not a common pursuit of teenagers in order to make money. I'm making a little headway on this lately, however.
• Supervision is optional. Kids as young as five are often running all over the neighborhood completely without parental supervision. My friends in other towns have seen very young kids out after dark, regularly, with no parent in sight. Yikes.

Oh dear. This is awfully long. I'm sure there will be more later so you can go to bed now.

Wildlife

Lately my children have switched roles. Eli is the wild one - see picture of legs below. Each day Eli comes home from school (where he spends 3 of 4 hours outdoors) with brand new colorful and bleeding injuries on his arms, legs or face. He doesn't seem to notice or care very much so I guess he's a regular boy. Mary has been risk averse but she is starting to walk a little each day, however reluctantly. Wildlife in Germany consists mostly of animals small enough to step on, though there are deer crossing signs on the autobahn.

The wildlife of interest at my house includes huge, black, furry bee-like creatures that can be as big as the bouncy balls you get from those 25 cent supermarket machines. I have no idea if they sting but I don't like them and tend to swat erratically at them while panicking when they try to fly through my open front door.

But most commonly sighted are what I affectionately refer to as crunchy spiders. They come in 3 sizes: squishably-small, scary, and terrifying. And yes, they have a lot of exoskeleton which makes audible crunching sounds during the process of elimination. I have kleenexed many small ones, vacuumed up many scary ones (about an inch across), and faced down only one (prayer of thanks) terrifyingly massive arachnid. I took a picture - sorry, my hands were shaking - before getting out the dustbuster and i'm telling you, this thing was so strong, it would not go into that suction tube for several long seconds. It measured at least 2.5 inches across. Kevin was on a trip to the states when this happened last fall. I had flashbacks for days.
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As my primary weapon, the Black-&-Decker handyvac the company gave us is one of my most prized posessions. It is also old. I have looked in store after store for a filter replacement with no luck. But my desperation knows no bounds so I hand-clean the filter and carefully dry it every few months so I will not lose this valuable tool. Maybe i'll bring a suspicious looking filter along to the states... Oh and don't be afraid to visit, now. I am skilled and will defend you.

And, finally, it appears we have some wilder teenagers somewhere on our hill. A few weeks back we woke up to an entire TP-ed neighborhood. All the garden walls and bushes and utility poles. It was a mess since it had also rained. A few days later someone shot fireworks directly over our house.... found the launchers in the front yard and the paper remains in the back. Ooooookaaay. And our friend Gabe - lives next door - has an 8-year old Audi that someone apparently wants for their own since they tried to break into two different windows on two nights in a row, unsuccessfully (though the windows are trashed). Such is life in the wild town of Einod.

Paris... Pourquois Pas? (Why not?)

Eli will tell you he knows three languages now, since he can say ' please' (s'il vous plait) and 'thank you' (merci) in French. He was pretty proud of that fact. Pictures are to the right and a quick rundown is below.

Day 0 (Wed): Bit of an ominous start... Kevin bumped into a car in the parking lot (no scratches) and then we realized we had missed the train due to faulty mommy-brain when reading European times printed on tickets (you'd think i'd know by now) and arrived in Paris at bedtime instead of dinnertime and 50 penalty Euros poorer. Thankfully the kids did great on the train, which had a dining car, and we found the apartment no problem.
Day 1 (Thur): Woke up in a very cool neighborhood - too cool for us but we stayed anyway - found our way to the Eiffel Tower, then the Arc du Triomphe, and down the infamous Champs Elysee boulevard. All pretty darned neat. Eli loved the massive traffic circle around the Arc. We ate at McDonalds. Took a nap. Went to Notre Dame but were too late to climb it so walked around inside and ate dinner nearby. Then we took an hour long boat ride along the river to see the sights.
Day 2 (Fri): Montmartre (Paris' hill) and Sacre Coeur church in the morning. Strange adult men, some drunk and dressed in suits, offering to draw our kids on sketch pads at the 'artist' colony. Back to Notre Dame and climbed up, up, up to the Gargoyles and a view. Naps. Then we played at the park in the Luxembourg Garden, ate sushi (yum) and walked through the Tuileries Garden to the Louvre, which was open late for cheap with no lines. Saw 'Mona' and 'Venus' then hightailed it home. Felt cool to be in a room with the most famous painting in the world, I must admit.
Day 3 (Sat): Musee D'Orsay for an hour with Monet, Manet, VanGogh and other greats. Sat on a bridge exhausted for awhile. Ate at McDonalds (don't laugh, we have kids). Went shopping at Gallery Lafayette (Paris invented the gigantic department store idea) and Eli got.... a toy car (shocker). Naps. Explored our neighborhood and then Les Halles - a magnificently large underground mall complex where most of Paris lives or hangs out (no tourists except for us) - and had ice cream (Ben & Jerry's!) before bed.
Day 4 (Sun): Saint Chapelle royal chapel with it's incredible 800 year old stained glass was our first stop. And there was a Sunday-only bird market nearby. Large guys bartering around a bird cage and huge sacks of birdseed. Not something one sees every day. Then we slipped into the Rodin Museum gardens to see his famous bronze works before we headed back to the apartment to pack, struggle our luggage to the train station, and go home. Kids were tired and Mary was impossible but we made it (whew!) home.... 4 weeks to the day until we fly for hours and hours and hours with a toddler on a small airplane to Phoenix. Can't wait!

Other Paris Notes: The Metro is a blessing and a curse. You can go anywhere BUT you're lugging your stroller and kids up and down thousands of stairs (and calling the stroller several kinds of names when it gets stuck in the entry/exit gates). The kids love it, the parents not so much. Naps are a must - at least for the adults. The stroller becomes an advantage at famous attractions because you're considered like the handicapped and get to take an elevator - when everyone else has to take the stairs. At the Rodin Museum we got to go past the entire looooong line of people directly to the front and right into the gardens because of the stroller. Mary would charm the guards and Eli would be cute so really, kids can be a plus. The negative is you don't get to stay very long at any one place. Eli walked and climbed and walked and climbed... he was terrific. Mary did really pretty well for a toddler. We had a great time. Come on over and we'll go with you, too.

Moseying the Mosel

We have a Pattern here that goes something like this: Sick Child - Medical Intervention (3 Doctor Visits + 2 Pharmacy Visits) - Vacation Travel - Newly Sick Child (usually the other one). Lots of fun. You should try it sometime. Thus far God has graciously allowed us sickness-free travel vacations, but icky illness is our punishment upon returning home. Eli got his 'all clear' from Mono yesterday. Mary woke up with a nasty-cling-to-mommy-and-whine-cold at 5:45am today. Kevin is gone. It was raining on a Saturday when we had our first social get-together in many weeks planned for the outdoors. I nearly cried. But our friends from church called, said I could come over anyway with my sick kid, and the day was saved. She fed us Mac-n-Cheese with hot dogs and good company. Never say that God is without mercy.

(Note: Links included in this blog entry.)

Last weekend we spent 3 nights on the Mosel River (see pics) watching the river traffic, gaping at the 1000's of motorcyclists and bicyclists, cruising the river and the road, seeing a castle, and generally traipsing around vineyard towns. The Burg Eltz castle, going through a river lock, and riding a chair lift were highlights. We fed swans, went to the pool, and had a wine-cellar tour as well. Cheap and yummy, wine is not remotely snooty in Germany, it's what everyone drinks with their dinner. A few observations we made:

• You're never too old to ride a bike. I mean this literally... 90 years old? So what? Get on your bike-with-a-basket and go to the bakery. Many, many older couples do this in smaller-town Europe.
• Motorcycle Payments = Mortgage Payments. The bikes cruising the Mosel valley were more expensive than all of your cars put together and the riders were outfitted in complete head-to-toe coordinated leather suits with helmets, gloves, and boots to match. Not one singe rider was wearing jeans.
• Summer homes can be portable. In the States motor homes are for travelling. Here they are cheap summer homes that are planted in one beautiful spot on the riverfront from May until October and used as someones weekend home for six months of the year. They do not move from that campground. They have huge tented porches with fancy furniture and neighborhood flea-markets. They have to leave in late fall when the river floods and retakes the campground for the winter.
• Town monuments should have basic rights. Our weekend stay in Zell meant we had to find the 'Schwarze Katze' (Black Cat) statue that lends its name and image to all the local wines, tourist shops, and restaurant dinner specials. After fruitless searching despite many kind strangers directing us to the center of town we finally looked under a tent that had been set up for some fest and had an Oompa Band (lederhosen, green wool knickers, corny music) playing. Behold, the black cat statue had been turned into... a bar. Built completely around the statue and serving wine and beer, it was the worst abuse we've seen of a town monument, ever.

Surprise!! Kevin went to Iowa the day after we got home and will hopefully return in time for our Paris trip the day after he returns. But he also flew to Montana for a quick weekend visit to surprise Mom & Dad. I hope that it's a good one, despite the fact that he didn't bring his kids. Mom is on 'round 2' with the chemo and for some reason isn't finding it to be loads of fun. While we feel very, very far away most of the time and would like to be there especially now, a quick visit by Kevin will have to do until we arrive 'en masse' on the first of July. And Dad made a CaringBridge page for Mom that looks great, keeps us informed, and helps shrink the miles between us.

The Eli Special Feature

Well, our 4-year-old (gasp! can this be true?) has had an adventurous life during his short time on earth. Tonight, we honor him in our special feature. The One, the Only (literally the one and only here in Germany)... ELI

So, Eli, tell us about yourself: Hmmm... I like to ask "why" even when I already know the answer. My favorite activities at school are playing in the sandbox, riding the Bobby Cars downhill - see my video below - and tumbling in the gym. Tattle-tailing on my sister is a new found delight. And I think that all the adults in my life - including my bachelor neighbor and my friends' moms and dads - are really my friends first and would rather talk to me than anyone else in the world. I love pears, dark chocolate, and peanut-butter & honey sandwiches. "Anyways" is one of my most used words and, anyways, I really don't like to play alone, ride my bike, try new foods, or get my picture taken - even though mom says I used to be a pro in front of the camera. Otherwise I'm just a typical, very sensitive boy who memorizes car makes and models, gives driving directions (including speed limit advice) to my parents, and speaks German as well as English.

What are the things you wish for? And what will you do when you grow up? If I could, I would wear a striped, collared polo-shirt paired with grey sweats, black socks, and my bright green Crocs every day. I also wish that I could get a cat (though we do have a neighborhood cat that likes our yard) and that it would always be winter and there would always be snow. Someday, when I grow up, I'm going to be a truck driver so I can drive all day long. Anyways, I might also want to be a train driver or a baseball player.

How are you keeping busy lately? Well, I started playing soccer, so that's big news. I've only been at it for a few weeks but I really love going for that one hour every Tuesday afternoon. Mostly I chase the bigger kids around (our group is 4-6 year-olds) and try to kick the ball into the closest goal, whether or not it belongs to my team. I also kick the ball when it's being set up for another kid's penalty shot or when the coach has it stopped with his foot. Sometimes I get tired and sit in the middle of the field during the game. So - it's really going well!

How have you been feeling? That's another thing... I really don't like the "little tiny bugs that get into the back of my throat" and I don't like going to the doctor except there is one nice doctor and she gives me gummy bears. I've been sick with one thing or another since we moved to Germany. First, I had a stomach bug and threw up for the first time ever. Then I got Strep two times in a row. And now the doctors think I have Mono. Mom almost cried because it means I am super tired, crabby, and my tonsils and lymph nodes are so swollen that I talk funny. And this could go on for several weeks! The good thing is that I never seem to get a fever when I'm sick and usually keep eating and drinking.

Back to your Birthday... how was it? Great! I was healthy on the day of my party and the weather was wonderful for the first time in weeks. My best friends all came and fought over who got to sit by me or hold my hand on the way to the park. And I got cars, games, and backyard soccer goals from my guests. On my actual birthday my place at the breakfast table was full of presents! I got lots of train stuff, Legos, books, a video, and a puzzle. I brought chocolate-chip cookies to school (which they don't have in Germany and everyone loved) and that night my neighbor Gabe brought me a big present with cars, a car-carrier, and candy. It was "awesome."

Any future plans? I've been wanting to try riding a horse - but only if it will go slowly - at the stables in our neighborhood. And we've got some vacations coming up. Vacations for me are all about what mode of transportation I will see or experience. What I remember about London, for example, is that we took a train to get there, rode on subways and double-decker red buses, and even got to go in the giant ferris wheel called the 'London Eye' (I think we did some other stuff but I don't remember what it was since I was always looking at the traffic on the road). Mom says that in May we're going on one trip where we'll drive our car for awhile and maybe even ride on a boat. Then after that we'll take a train to Paris! We'll ride the subway while we are there and another boat and maybe even a Taxi! So, needless to say, I am very excited. After that it's two airplanes to the United States to see all my cousins and Grandpas and Grandmas. It is going to be busy. But I would be just as happy to sit in a chair on the main road in our town and watch the traffic go by all day long.

Any last words? Yes, to all my younger fans. Never say "I can't" because you will be able to do something if you just keep trying (like puzzles, zippers and buttons for me). Also, I love you and miss you all and can't wait to see you soon. Tchuss! (That means 'See ya! Bye!')

Eli

Tragedy & Triumph

Tragedy: My husband, whom I love dearly, breached our unwritten marriage contract last week when he dared to purchase and bring home a scale. Many times in the past he has said we should get one and I said "not in my house." I came home from a 'girls night out' to find the atrocity in the middle of my floor. Wrong, wrong, wrong. The abominable contraption gives a person's weight (something I kept hidden from Kevin for many years) in pounds, kilograms and, of course, stones. He looked a bit sheepish but tried to pass it off as a gift so I could see just how much weight I'd lost since moving to Germany. Uh huh. Now it is in the corner behind the shower where it should be forgotten. But really that's the best location to get a good number just before I get in the shower in the morning, after going to the bathroom, before eating breakfast, and without clothes.

Triumph: In our area there are three 'Deere Families.' A fourth family returned to the States recently and gave us some good stuff they no longer needed and couldn't use in America. But they did not have the ultimate appliance, the one find all 'Deere Wives' (as we are known) yearn for and may spend their entire stays seeking. The venerable Crock Pot. The esteemed Slow Cooker does not exist here, in general, and American versions cannot be converted due to the high voltage needed and electrical incompatibility. However, there have been persistent rumors that European versions do exist... ("A lady in my church has a cousin who's neighbor once saw one!" and similar stories). Now, 145 kilometers away there are 20+ Deere families and they come and go frequently. One Deere Wife sent out an email with a 'for sale list' recently since she is headed back to the States with her husband soon. I usually don't even bother to read them as I have no need for more stuff but for some reason I did read it. And buried low in the long list of furniture, European appliances, and junk was a crock pot. It had been 2 hours since the email came but I hit that 'Reply' button and my fingers flew over the keyboard as my heart raced with hopeful excitement. And I GOT IT! She said 3 additional people asked about it after me (heh, heh). She wanted about $30 for it, is all, and somehow didn't realize that she could have gotten $hundreds$ if she'd simply held a mini-auction. It's mine! It's mine! I did have to drive 145 kilometers in terrible traffic and rain, tormenting my daughter and myself to meet her at the monthly 'Deere Wives' breakfast in order to pick it up, but that's a small price to pay for such a jewel. I acquired it this morning. We had BBQ wieners tonight.

Pin-Ball-Autos; Mary Cooks / Eli Kicks

European roads are very narrow. Think 'Chicago alleyway' narrow for every neighborhood street. This necessitates more road rules and smaller cars. The road rules we've figured out, the smaller car...? Well, more on that later.

If a car is parked on the side of the street (which means half on the sidewalk, half on the road), and this is always, then there is no longer room for two cars to pass each other in opposite directions. Speed deterrents like large, cemented flower pots cause the same situation. And horses. We have horse traffic here. SO, in all these situations one car must give way. Who goes? First Rule: The car coming up the hill, if applicable (hills are quite steep, all cars are manual transmission, better not to stop going up). Second Rule: The car on the clear side of the street - meaning cars are parked on the other side - so that driver must pull in and wait. Third Rule: Survival of the fittest, biggest, fastest. It's all pretty organized, actually, and flashing your lights means 'you go first' to the opposing driver.

While the Polizei are rarely seen on the autobahn the speed cameras are everywhere, as is the traffic and construction, which is even more out of control here than in the Midwest, I think. Anyway, we arrived with flawless driving records. This didn't stop the auto insurance company from scalping us for our two boring cars - we're not exactly driving bright orange, Mach-1 speeding Lamborghinis, here. But, they may have had good reason. Since arriving in Germany - that's 6 months ago, already - we've experienced the following:

• 4 speeding tickets: all for Kevin, in rentals; two on one trip to France - talented!
• 2 parking tickets: one in Austria, one downtown; meter-cops abound.
• 4 "oops, sorry" incidents: most of these are mine due to my not small car and the too small streets and driveways previously mentioned. I knocked in another car's mirror when performing the "you go. no, you go" maneuver described above. No damage since many mirrors are designed to fold in/out. I scraped up the hubcap of our rental in a tiny entrance to a parking garage, but they never called us on it. I backed into the drivers door of an SUV leaving some one's house in the rain at night. No damage since it had that bounce-back shell material. And Kevin scraped up the front corner of our car after getting too close to the light pole at church.
• 1 "total" accident: Kevin was rear-ended in a rental last week in heavy traffic on the autobahn, domino effect hit the car in front of him, nothing more than a sore neck.... but the rental was considered totaled.

The lesson is that driving in Germany is dangerous. But road trips are fun. Just be nervous, paranoid, and suspicious - you'll be fine. Kids can't get there license here til they are 18 and that's after about $3000 worth of required driver's ed. The written and driving exams are brutal, we've heard. Iowa has a deal with Germany - we get International DL's for 35 euro's and a passport sized photo - no exams required. Phew. On second thought, maybe it would've been better if we'd had to work for our driving privileges....

Mary cooks! Yes, we're terribly proud. Mary has mastered the oven and stove top controls and now opens the door to the oven, usually when I'm baking something. Safety devices are on order since Friday when, thanks to my helpful daughter, my first batch of chocolate chip cookies were burned to a crisp at 500 degrees before I realized what she had done. Sigh.

Eli's soccer career: While he still wants to be "a truck driver and a baseball player" when he grows up, Eli is also interested in soccer. Hence he begins playing this week in the 4-year old group at the field near our house. We bought some shiny, fast "fussball cleats" this weekend and he's excited. Pictures and stories to follow at a later date. Mostly I just want him to get outside... with a ball... and no Hot Wheels cars in sight. (Pic below is Eli with best buds Charlie, his sister Olivia, and Marc).

Name Games

Guess the Gender Name Game:
* Florian
* Heike
* Uwe
* Ute
* Micha

Answers are below. Of course, many names popular Stateside are here as well... but they sure don't sound the same. I asked what a little boy at Eli's school was named and the teacher said "Coll" or maybe "Cawl." What? I asked how it was spelled. C - A - R - L. Aha. The "R" thing... It is not rolled like it is in Spanish. In fact German gives the common"R" two sounds. One pronunciation is guttural - back where your tonsils hang. The other pronunciation, like in the name Carl or the word Butter (yes, butter), is where it is nearly silent. I say nearly because there is a sound there but just thinking about the letter when speaking, rather than attempting to say it, is usually all the pronunciation it needs. Eli, of course, does this perfectly. The most popular names we've run into are Heidi or Katrin/Katerine for women and Torsten or Thomas or Jurgen for men. Other fun ones are Manfred and Wolfgang.

Family Names: Mary is normal, though not common, for Germany, but usually in the form Maria. Eli is completely strange and I pronounce it slowly so people will understand. In the German Bible and translated it would be Elias ('ee-lee-us'). Kevin is normal but not common. But Sandra (pro: 'sondra')? No one my age has my name in the states. Here they are everywhere. Sandra's abound on restaurant name tags and at neighborhood get-togethers. One of the main news anchors is a Sandra. I saw two more on name tags this past week. It's funny, but it actually helps... it's the one thing that's not strange about me when I'm meeting the locals.

Florian = male, pronounced easily like it is spelled
Heike = female, pronounced like the word 'hike' plus 'uh', hike-uh
Uwe = male, pronounced 'oo-vay'
Ute = female, can be spelled Jutta, both pronounced 'yoo-tuh'
Micha = male, pronounced 'mee-shah'

How'd you do? There are some that are even more strange, but I can't even spell them much less pronounce them.

Castles and Ketchup

We went castle-hopping over Easter in Luxembourg. It was great. Except winter finally arrived in Western Europe... on the day of the Spring Equinox. Easter Sunday dawned clear and cold so we bundled the kids and went "hiking" in the Mullerthal Forest. Hiking here is defined as: "drive to next designated parking area near scenic land feature, carry stroller up/down uneven stone steps, take pictures, carry stroller back to car while kicking self for forgetting backpack, repeat." The best castle we've seen to date was in Beaufort, a place not even mentioned in travel guides. It had a torture chamber, tall towers, and was not ridiculously over-"restored" - the sad fate of many a castle. Plus we ate at a French Patisserie (translation: yummy bakery) in Beaufort that had the most delicious fancy finger pastries we've ever gulped down in an unappreciative hurry with pop and apple juice. Ah well. Someday, we've promised ourselves, we will enjoy the culinary aspect of travelling. Until then it's train station McDonald's, curbside brats, or cheese squares and meat sticks from the grocery store taken back to our room. Travelling with the kids does have its advantages. Sleeping all together in a closet-sized room with no Internet access means bedtime is 7:45, for everyone.

My next blog will examine the differences between German and American obsessions. But today, following a great weekend that nonetheless highlighted some of Europe's shortfalls, I must comment on the tight-fisted restaurant culture. Contrary to American belief that portion sizes are smaller here, plates have plenty of food. But in other areas (mostly noticed only by parents travelling with young children), the European restaurant is sadly lacking.

Ketchup, for example. Remember the impossible-to-open-until-it-suddenly-squirts-all-over-your-blouse packets that contained enough ketchup for five - maybe six - fries total? They use those here. And they'll cost you 20 - 50 Euro cents per, my friend. Napkins are rationed here based on the one-per-diner rule that obviously doesn't account for the eating habits of 1 year olds. They don't charge you for them but they will glare at you in disgust, no doubt thinking "slovenly barbarians..." Our diaper bag ensures we always have wipes to fill the inevitable cleanliness gap, but still. And Refills. This is a basic human right in the States and restaurants not offering them for free are stingy, un-family-friendly snobs. Sadly, this is not so here. Some will tell you that the lack of ice in drinks means you get your money's worth. Whatever, cheapos.


Finally, we cannot neglect to mention gas stations and bathroom access in our rant against the purveyors of stinginess, though their connection to the culinary culture is tenuous (or truck driver related), at best. Despite a fascination with all things auto, Germany and surrounding countries will make you work to find your fuel. Gas stations are often not on main streets or autobahn exits, not open early / late / on weekends, and not very close together. I guess the lack of competition must be nice, it costs us almost $8 per gallon of diesel; gas would be even more painful. And you'd better have change with you just in case you do find a gas station or rest stop. That'll be 50 cents to use the facilities, thank you. The term "public restroom" refers to trees and bushes. Those wanting modern plumbing, even at many tourist attractions and shopping areas, will be coughing up the museum admission fee, buying an appetizer, or desperately pleading to get to their goal.

Party!

Fasching = Carnival = Dress up, dance, eat and parade. Valentine's Day warrants exactly one tiny end of the aisle in the grocery store in February. The rest of the store is devoted to Fasching. The adults are almost as into it as the kids and their outfits are definitely wild. We did not partake but the kids joined in... and took over all the events they were invited to. I don't know where they get it from but my kids love to party.

"Once upon a time there was a beautiful ladybug and a fierce pirate. And they revered the same colors - black and red."
Here's my attempt at a pirate ship. The treasure chest was on the other cheek but not as recognizable, I fear.

She really was awfully darned cute.

My tough soldier with his real sounding gun... the first i've allowed around here. It was, of course, very popular at school and the teachers finally took it away. Eli's costume was the coolest that day, for sure.

At the village Fasching celebration Mary discovered 'fairy dust' confetti on the floor. What a find.

Battling Back

Yesterday I...

• Re-stocked the bookshelf
• Re-packed the playdoh supplies
• Re-filled the paper recycling basket (twice)
• Re-rolled the toilet paper roll (twice)
• Put countless items back into my makeup bag AND my husband's shaving kit
• Re-assembled a baby book
• Put the candles back in the drawer of the entertainment center
• Threw away an entire box of emptied, torn-up tissues
• Re-constructed Eli's train track
• Put away 4 baskets of numerous small toys (not to play with, just to see them dumped)
• And, finally, kissed two sets of drawer-squished fingers

The cause of so much 'work?' My beautiful, charming, determined, destructive, and apparently deaf daughter. The work "No" prompts smiles, not obedience. Why even try to follow and repair? I really, really wanted to vacuum just one level of our townhouse. And I succeeded, though mysteriously exhausted. My husband must wonder how 10 minutes worth of vacuuming can cause a backache and be so tiring... hard to explain the 5.8 hours of preparation and hurricane-Mary-recovery operations.

Besuchers!! Besuchers!! It sounds like 'berserkers' but really it means 'Visitors' - i'm sure no irony is intended. We took our first visitors, Mom & Dad Flikkema and Janelle & David Lee, on a week of touring Switzerland, France, and our little corner of Germany. By touring I mean driving, walking, driving, walking, and then driving. It was wonderfully draining. We saw the Alps, did some sledding, were awed by the Black Forest, silenced in a church called 'God's Lantern', devastated at Verdun, and romanced in the castle and town of Heidelberg. We loved having them and welcome all to come and see - for the first time or again and again.

March 2008 Vacation

Since they left we have been busy.... sleeping. Have you ever thought that "travel recuperation" could be a multi-million dollar wellness business? Specialist providers could partner with chiropractors (also a popular post-trip service) and give out sleep-drug prescriptions, unpacking advice, brag-book production, and sell things like sweats and old t-shirts as well as catered meals for that 'first week back.' It could all be booked ahead of time during pre-trip planning. I may be on to something here...

Sick stinks, 'specially single.

He didn't want to go, but Kevin had to fly to Kansas City for the week. As punishment he has being-gone-guilt and the knowledge that it is 65 degrees here. Not so in Kansas City. This being our sickest winter (though mildest in weather) ever, I decided to get Strep Throat at the same time Kevin was leaving. My first experience with the infection. After almost 3 days of excruciating, nerve-shrieking agony in my throat - reverberating through my brain and eardrums - I will forever be the most compassionate person on the planet to all persons afflicted. What I never knew was that you also get a jackhammer headache, high fever with chills and sweats, and skin so sensitive that changing clothes makes you cry. God taught me a quick and clear lesson however, that He is good and He takes care of me.

It was Saturday, Kevin was on an airplane and I was debating whether or not to take the kids with me to the hospital (having no doctor for myself yet) so I could get a diagnosis and some very strong drugs. I called three friends - all answered the phone - God knows people - and worked a minor miracle. Sarah is a nurse, listened to my list of symptoms, told me it sounded bad enough to search for drugs and offered to come get the kids. Liz called her friends and found a doctor that does house calls and speaks English! Thank YOU God. He came 10 minutes after I called his number and gave me the prescription I needed. And he was really nice. Lastly, my friend Heidi (who with her husband runs the pharmacy at the University Hospital, wouldn't you know) called and demanded that Eli be given to her for most of Sunday. And her husband answered my questions about the prescription and they gave other good healing advice. At noon Saturday I was so miserable I was close to tears and more than a little desperate. By 3pm prayers had been quickly answered and I was on the road to healing with prescription in hand. It's not a story about sickness, but about God and His provision in a personal, difficult time. I won't soon forget.

Sunday Walks: Eli had a tradional German Sunday walk with my friend's family today while I stayed home to heal and let Mary nap. Sunday walks in Germany (called Volksmarches when done officially) follow these rules. Walking on Sunday...

• Is required. For every German family. Unless there is a horrific storm or sub-zero temperatures. And there is nothing else to do anyway since you can't work outside your house or go shopping.
• Is a fairly serious hike through a forest, with hills. This is hilly, wooded country and there are kilometers upon kilometers of paths built expressly for this purpose. All residents of this country live within walking distance of public paths and a forest.
• Will include lunch and a beer. In the middle of forests and along the paths are shacks and restaurants ready to serve the steady stream of reliable, hungry customers.
• Is a 3-5 hour event (including lunch). Eli was gone for 5 hours today and nearly fell apart at the seams when he got home, he was so exhausted... but happy.
• May be missed if biking, roller blading, or horseback riding instead.

We've begun to observe this tradion ourselves in our own nearby woods and hills and the paths are busy with horses, bikes, people and strollers. A worthy competing activity to the "football game on TV and a nap" routine we favored in the States...

Love & Kisses...

Happy Birthday Baby: Our baby turned 1 year old last week. Just in time for the big event Mary learned how to 'kiss-kiss' on command. She sticks out her lower lip and offers her mouth to you for some love. And she gets plenty. Rather than avoid the cliches, I embraced her near-Valentines birthdate wholeheartedly (snicker, snort) and scattered pink, red, and white balloons - including hearts, of course - for our little party. Our friends John and Sarah came by with their kids. Low key, messy, and fun. Pictures to the right. We reflected later that night what a gift our surprise girl has been and are so grateful to God for the precious daughter entrusted to us. And we like her big brother, too.

As my sisters forwarned, bedtime has become a time when Eli has big questions and comes up with the best pronouncements, things I wish I could remember forever. Tonight he talked about God's house in Heaven and how He also lives in our hearts (even Mary's!) but how did he make us? I reminded him of the story of Adam and Eve and also babies inside of mommies and he says: "I know what God did! He took some sand and mixed it up. Then He made it really hot and then He put the bones into it! But how did it get into the mommy?" The conversation continued and he was thinking hard about the complexities of babies growing arms, legs, and even teeth inside of their gums... all before they are born. Unexpected, wonderful conversations - one of the gifts of having a little boy. A favorite phrase you may hear from this child if you visit and ask him to do something with you: "I'm not available right now but you can do it by yourself." Ah, independence.

Don't be shocked. Not just for punks and rebellious teens, brightly colored hair is one of the first things you will notice about the German people. Upon my arrival I began an immediate and frantic search for a good salon. Having colored my hair in 6-week intervals for the last 12 years a safe medium brown, I was extremely anxious about the abnormally high number of otherwise normal looking women - of all ages - with fluorescent orange, red, and purple hair. We're talking about regular folks in the neighborhood - moms and grandmas alike. German acquaintances surmised - quietly - that these were 'East German' women or 'Russian Germans' - a few of the many stereotyped groups in this area. Regardless, you're going to see them, and are forwarned. But my hair shall remain brown.

Autobahn Oddities. Unless you're driving the Autobahn at night you won't notice another strange phenomenon in Germany, the total lack of light pollution. Completely dark driving. For the most part the Autobahn has zero lights (not on signs, or difficult corkscrew entrances/exits, or bridges), zero reflective barriers or markers, and even dull hard-to-see paint lines. A consistently large buffer zone made mostly of tall woods between the Autobahn and any buildings helps and everyone turns their lights off at 8:00pm regardless (that's 20:00 here, by the way). It's almost spooky. But don't be spooked by the seemingly 'homeless' cars hanging out under underpasses - thats carpool parking. One last warning. If you spend much time at all driving around our host country, you will at some point see a man peeing on the side of the road... and not behind a tree, a bush, or even a car door. Gute Fahrt!! ("Enjoy the Drive!")